Scout died very suddenly in August. I knew I would get another dog and began looking casually about 2 weeks later. I figured it would take a while to find the right dog anyway, so no harm in looking.
Ella showed up 6 weeks after Scout had died. I played with Ella for 2 hours or so at the SPCA and decided that she had so much potential and I really liked her. What was I waiting for and adopted her. I had just gone back to school in the city at age 35 and so it was probably not the smartest time to get a new dog. Commuting and homework and and and...There were some badddddddd days in the beginning.
I will admit that there have been some bumpy times in the last 6 months where I just wanted Scout back. We were such a fine team and I knew her every move and what every expression meant. There was no guess work involved. Coming home after a long day at school all I wanted was to see her there and have that stress-free walk together. She was 9 so she was mellow. My brain felt like it was being stretched way too hard with all of the things I was learning both during the day and at home with the dog.
That being said, I knew I didn't want to pass that longing on to Ella so I chose times to grieve for Scout. During my commute, in the bath (Ella never comes in there). When with Ella it was about Ella. I was good about that!
She has proven to be even more work than I thought a rescue would be, but it is rewarding and she is amazing and I do love having a dog around like you do.
I saw one of Brad's episodes where the couple had lost a good dog pal and they still had his stuff everywhere. I was bawling through the whole thing and on commercials I went around the house and took down all of Scout's photos. Yup, tearing up now even. Just like he had the couple do, I went out the next day and bought photo frames just the right colour for Ella and put her picture up about a week later. I had a week or so with no dog photos at all. Just the bare nails hanging on the wall. It was tough. But it was time to start moving on and celebrating my new dog. Things started going better with her training after that too. In the end I brought out one photo of Scout and me in the canoe. It reminds me of all of the great trips we went on together, but it is somewhere discreet. Ella is everywhere.
I still talk about Scout and I think that's ok. I don't think I compare Ella as being negative to Scout but just different because I am finding her to be so different. It isn't bad at all, it simply amazes me sometimes so I comment on it here in the forums. Now that we have some of the wildness under control I am able to really see Ella's personality for who she is and celebrate that. Different from my buddy Scout but just as great.
You said the litter won't be ready until July. Can you tell them you're slightly torn about the decision right now and just see how the next weeks go? Would they let you back out last minute if when the adoption time comes you realize you aren't ready?
Sorry for the loss of your pet. Good luck with deciding what to do now.
